Friday, 24 April 2015

3 reasons why mishaps are inevitable, 3 steps for coming out of mishaps and 3 techniques to turn a mishap into an opportunity

I always thought till sometime back - mishaps and really bad things would happen around me and NEVER to me. You also would have thought so. Till the first misfortune struck. And then other misfortunes followed. In spite of that if you are standing today with smile on your lips you are fortunate - not because you have come out of your mishap - but because reality touched you the first time when the first mishap struck you. Without going through hard reality, how could you have become a man?

3 reasons why mishaps in life are inevitable

 

Reason 1. Your life system has Financial, Relational, Health and Want components. All your near and dear ones have their own life system components. Failure in any component of any of these life systems might be a mishap to you. A fridge, a computer, an organization or  relation - anything in nature or built by humans has its own life cycle. Your life span being usually much longer than its components, failures in  any one of the components is a near certainty.

Reason 2. Chaos or disorder in the universe including man-made world always increase. Failures also increase making individual mishaps of any kind more and more probable with passing time. As you live longer, chances of major failures increase to a near certainty. Your life is not beyond larger laws.

Reason 3. Human society becoming ultra competitive with reducing resources per person, system stress and failures increase continually.
It is no surprise that a mishap will happen to me or you. We are no special persons protected from all evils (if we look at a mishap as an evil).
Truth: I may fall - it is natural, but it is important that I stand up after a fall.

3 ways to come out of a mishap

 

Way 1. Take account: When you get your breath back, do a clear accounting of assets you still have: are you still breathing? Can you think reasonably even if you may feel numb in mind now? Then you are fortunate. Know now that it is a miracle for a human to be alive with innumerable unseen unknown forces constantly working against it.
Do not rue the loss - count and value what are left. Just as no loss can be replaced, all losses (except loss of mind and life) can be recovered from, as Nature abhors vacuum - it is a larger law. It will fill up IN TIME the vacuum left in you because of your loss. Trust nature. Learn to trust. Maybe for the first time in your life.
Scars will remain, they will never go. But have you ever closely seen the scars on a deeply lined face of a very old man? Those scars make his smile the more beautiful and rich. Without scars you have not lived.

Way 2. Review: Then you stand up, shake your mental limbs and reevaluate the new world you are left with. What will be the goal of your life in this new world? How can you best utilize the assets you are left with? Perforce you may be doing this for the first time in your life. Human life potentially is incredibly rich. Most of the time we never appreciate it. This is the opportunity to appreciate.
Choose your path. Now you are more experienced. Immerse yourself into creative activities with focused energy. Now you know failures may come anytime. Life does not move a level straight path always. Be glad that you have been given a second chance.

Way 3. Look around. You will now be able to see the plight of other living humans. You will be able to feel the pains. Know for sure this is a great gift. Probably now you will be able to work for others. In time, even if it is not now, you will know the true joy of living - loving and living for others - not for yourself alone.

3 surefire techniques to turn a mishap into a great opportunity

 

Technique 1. Analyze the reasons for the failure. Identify the causes internal and external. Strengthen the weaknesses. Be sure that if you accept your weakness it can always be strengthened. If the reasons are external, take preventive measures. You will come out to be a much stronger person. Unless a child falls it never learns to walk. Unless you fail you can never learn what success really is. All learning comes through mistakes. Unless you make mistakes how could you have learned?


Technique 2. Be a teacher. Now you can be. Share your learning with others. Gains will be manifold.


Technique 3. Focus your attention on the adverse elements in this new situation. These are most valuable. Explore with new thinking, how you can utilize these apparently adverse elements for creating new positive pathways. It has never failed to surprise me that in every adverse situation, the adverse elements could be used for creating a new and  highly positive path.


Believe that every mishap can be turned into a great opportunity.

A simple story

My client, a 22 year old stripling, went through a deep tragedy losing two and half months of study time just before her final exams. When she could start her preparation she thought she would just be able to give a tolerably good show as the exam was rumored to be postponed by two weeks. Three days later she called me, totally distraught, "Exam dates are final - not postponed."

It was a hard struggle alright - only one month was left. Nevertheless, she didn't fall down - kept on standing her feet.

That was direct front line fight - we all go through such travails in life. No mystery there - we need to muster all our resources and battle on.

As the exam ended, she visibly came out of a long tunnel, and basked in sunlight again.

Being experienced, I warned her, not once,"You can't take a break more than a week. Next stage admission tests are only one and half month away. Remember, that is your target. You have crossed only one hurdle." She went on enjoying her days. No effect.

Then the law of hidden opportunities popped up in my mind, just by chance.

I approached her now with more confidence, "Look at the two weeks pre-exam apparent loss as a gift to be used now for admission tests. Your peers may not think that way and waste this valuable time." Her eyes opened wide with comprehension.




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